Another school, that’s right readers, ANOTHER school, has decided to ban the game of Tag from recess. Apparently, some children claimed to being harassed and chased at will during the game at the Discovery Canyon Campus school in Colorado Springs.

According to Assistant Principal Cindy Fesgen: “It causes a lot of conflict on the playground.”

Some students claimed to being chased at will. I’d like to translate that phrase, for those of us who use less colloquial parlance in our everyday dialogues. It means they were chased on purpose.

Forgive me for questioning the authority of the all-mighty PC god, but isn’t Tag a game where intent to tag is part of the activity?

Let’s say I’m “It”. To not tag anyone at will, I must basically run hither and yon, arms outstretched, in the forlorn hope that I may at some point come in contact with one who is not “It”, at which point the ceremonial changing of the “It” guard would take place.

Citizens of sanity, I implore you. Resist this ban. Fight it at the highest levels municipally, statewide, even nationally. It is what we call a slippery slope.

Every Phys. Ed. teacher in the country should be petrified. I’m serious here now. If Tag is bad, how can the games/sports listed below not be?

Football: Tackling the ball carrier? Need I say more?
Kickball: To get one out, you must throw rubber ball at runner…at will. Surely some stigma must be attached to this.
Tennis: You are intentionally trying to make your opponent miss the ball. TOTALLY not fair. Tennis match should just be hour long volleys where both sides agree to mutually end the game…no winner.
Duck Duck Goose: The EPITOME of harrassing and choosing at will. It is a danger to children’s development everywhere and must be stopped.
Ring a Round the Rosy: Dancing and taking delight in the Black Plague? How could we have been so wrong?
Square Dancing: Choosing partners? At will? The touching? The sache-ing? The promenading? I mean, hands are touching here people.
Track: How dare we allow one person be declared the winner just because he has less body fat and longer legs than the rest of us?
Volleyball: Spiking? Serving the ball to a specific person because we KNOW she’s afraid of the ball?

Gym teachers, your jobs may just be on the line here.

This is idiocy.