In a stunning move, fake conservative pundit/silly man Stephen Colbert announced in a statement today that he is bowing out of the presidential race, after the South Carolina Democratic Executive Council voted down his attempt to get on the ballot by a vote of 13-3.
“Although I lost by the slimmest margin in presidential election history—only 10 votes—I have chosen not to put the country through another agonizing Supreme Court battle,” Colbert said Monday in a statement. “It is time for this nation to heal.”
I wish he had been able to get into the race. He had gotten a lot of criticism for making a mockery of the election process.
I, on the other hand, think that makes him a great candidate. To quote “V for Vendetta” on this, November the 5th, only make fun of the things that really matter.
November 5, 2007 at 3:19 pm
Remember, remember the Fifth of November,
The Gunpowder Treason and Plot,
I know of no reason
Why Gunpowder Treason
Should ever be forgot.
Guy Fawkes, Guy Fawkes, t’was his intent
To blow up King and Parliament.
Three-score barrels of powder below
To prove old England’s overthrow;
By God’s providence he was catch’d
With a dark lantern and burning match.
Holloa boys, holloa boys, let the bells ring.
Holloa boys, holloa boys, God save the King!
A penny loaf to feed the Pope
A farthing o’ cheese to choke him.
A pint of beer to rinse it down.
A faggot of sticks to burn him.
Burn him in a tub of tar.
Burn him like a blazing star.
Burn his body from his head.
Then we’ll say ol’ Pope is dead.
Hip hip hoorah!
Hip hip hoorah hoorah!